Dealing with Death...

Hi All,

On Sunday February 23rd 2014 my life was irreversibly changed,..................... my mom passed away after a short battle with cancer and I honestly thought I was in some sort of twilight zone and expected someone to say that what was happening was not real.

At the time, nothing was funny ( and I have a great sense of humor) nothing was important - not even my dreams, I had no zeal to do anything.  However,  I was still getting up and preparing myself for work, and operating on auto pilot.  However, when I got home, my mind was filled with memories and what ifs.   After that experience, the words 'be kinder than necessary as everyone is fighting their own battles' has new meaning. 

One of the things that helped and still helps me is a book which was gifted to me called 'Living with loss and grief' 

Of course everyone's process will be different, based on their circumstances people will deal with the hurt and pain in different ways.  I've learned that sometimes the best help you can give to another in such circumstances is simply to say nothing...... I've heard the constant, 'i'm here for you' or 'anything you need let me know' and they are oft times just empty promises.  Contrary to popular belief, (in my humble opinion) you don't get 'over' the death of a loved one.  There are several ways that can assist with coping..

• Attend the funeral/memorial for the deceased 
• Have a good cry when you need it 
• Talk about it when you can (join a support group if you feel you can't talk to family or friends) 
• Pray (if you are so inclined)

Above all else,  be patient with yourself and don't be concerned about society's limits on how long the process should be. 

You do you and before long you'll laugh again.....as I do